| home part 1 |
[May. 8th, 2008|11:01 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | I'm at zero | ] |
| [ | music |
| | anagnorisis - song C (recording drums on sunday!) | ] |
home from the first leg of tour. 8 days of craziness. no vehicles broke down this time (yay!) but we're in even more debt than when we started (boo!). haha. whatever. best band we played with: Lex Vegas. best venue: the Underground in Sandusky, OH - seriously, bands, you need to play there. Amazing sound, cool venue, free food (not vegan-friendly though), drinks (they have monster and shit). and they videotaped our set and interviewed us so that shit should be online at some point. the best show (for me, anyway) was ft. wayne when we had kids hardcore dancing to black/death metal the entire set and I went nuts and everyone loved it. plus I got to see my dudes dusty and zeke and chill with them for a day.
this is home "part 1" because we leave again next week for 10 days with burial within, but also because I will hopefully do a better update (i.e. "part 2") about the tour and what transpired. we met some pretty crazy fucking people and some really, really awesome people, too.
all right, fuck, I'm done. sleep! |
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| the thrill of being a musician |
[Apr. 15th, 2008|05:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the traffic on bardstown | ] |
( just precious ) |
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| this is too embarrasing to post on myspace |
[Mar. 29th, 2008|11:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | music |
| | darkstep.org | ] |
( partly, partly. ) |
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| Get ready to dance.... |
[Mar. 20th, 2008|03:25 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home! | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired, stoked | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Regurgitate - Dismantle the Afterbirth | ] |
Today was in general a good day. Saw a chiropractor who gives a nice discount since I work at Amazing Grace who is going to look at my ankle x-rays and hopefully treat that more extensively. Went to M.C. Sales and got the fucking hook-up! Flaxseed, OG, Raw (the way I would type it as a receipt alias :) for $2 a bottle! Berry/Acai Juice for $2 a bottle. And TONS of mostly-organic, vegan cereal. All this shit is so goddamn expensive full price. Expired? Pshhhh, doesn't matter. Vegan food never goes bad! (ha ha!). Man I love that place. If you live near New Albany, IN, check it out.
( For about $21 )
Then, met up with Josh, the dude we rented the van from, at Big O Tires to get the tires swapped out and a partial refund on my card. Finally the van fiasco is over. We won't be doing any month-long tours, but we are closer to paying off our debt and getting on with the fucking show. Met Zak at Ideal Fitness to work-out before the show. Awesome gym, and perfect room/floor for the kettlebell. So that put me in a stellar mood for the rest of the evening, being able to cram a work-out into the already tight day. Productivity was high.
The show was actually really goddamn fun even though by the time we played there were only a few people left. But everyone crammed into the front of the stage and went nuts. And we went nuts! Our new song has a faux-breakdown (which is actually a typical Cannibal Corpse style mosh part, but who's checking?) and kids loved it. Our friends in Nemesis Enforcer rocked out hard and a good time was had by all. We made some money, played a tight set, and then ate a bunch of pizza that made Zak throw up and my stomach hurt. And someone ordered fried Oreos. What the fuck? I tried a piece of one (yes, Oreos are vegan) - it wasn't terrible but GODDAMN is that unhealthy. Oh, and we talked about weight lifting and routines and shit. Hahahaha! We are such a nerdy band that it is fun to get into stereotypical "jock" mode every now and then.
Fun! Honestly, those shows are the best. It would be fun to play on a huge stage with hundreds of screaming fans, and when the money poured in perhaps I would change my tune, but to rock out with your friends in a small intimate setting like that - nothing beats it. We should have these new songs online or in a demo form by June so everyone can hear the progress that we have made. It is some brutal shit.
Come see us at April 4th and May 26th at Uncle Pleasant's! (link)
"Making time for the gym is cool, but you gotta make time for metal." -ZD
( Edit: FUCK, I forgot the most insane part of the show. ) |
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| ... |
[Feb. 20th, 2008|12:47 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Bach - Contrapunctus 8, a 3 | ] |
Fever-induced dreams from 02/20/08:
Huge warehouse. Tapestries and signs like Nazi Germany, only for food products of the "natural living" variety. My room in my house is filled with regalia, each a key part of ordering these items. I can't just order an item, I have to go through a routine to do so. As I twist and turn in my bed with sickness, each pain is indicative of a certain action or procedure required of me through this job.
I walk out of the warehouse after taking a giant snake, the kind that you can drape around your neck. It doesn't fear me, nor I it, and I let my mother hold it. We walk along the beach, talking about the job, with the snake, at night.
On the ocean ships come in, each bearing new products for me to process. The procession never ends. I have found a way to order effectively that causes the products to appear in my warehouse, but it is tedious.
When I arise in the morning, mouth coated with dried saliva and throat swollen, I am surprised to look around my room and see nothing out of the ordinary. It was all an illusion, my brain computing and processing all night only to torment me. There is no friendly snake, no complicated ordering system. Just a dark room with flashing lights from external hard drives and routers. Have I learned anything besides how my body deals with sickness? The physical pain persists, and mentally I am shaken. But I will recover.
"When I lie down I think, 'How long before I get up?'
The night drags on, and I toss till dawn.
My body is clothed with worms and scabs,
my skin is broken and festering.
My days are swifter than a weaver's shuttle,
and they come to an end without hope." -Job 7:4-6
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| pain...made to order |
[Feb. 6th, 2008|12:58 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | viral | ] |
| [ | music |
| | glass casket - genesis | ] |
tissues filled with snot piling up on the center speaker. sore thigh muscles. a neck that can't turn all the way to the right. cuts and bruises all over. zits and dirty hair. what a goddamn mess.
the tour was canceled half way through. I've learned by writing that conclusion so many times that "canceled" is with one el, not two. sometimes my spelling surprises me.
there is definitely a split faction on livejournals and blogs of the metaphorical and the the non. those who choose to write about their day in realistic detail and those who choose cryptic sentences and phrases designed to confuse or release some cornered emotion out to the world but without clarity. this is ironic as many of you are probably applying that theory to this current paragraph. but if you will take this literally and understand for a second that the catharsis obtained by doing so (using metaphors, analogies, hiding words, short, esoteric statements) is actually enjoyable for some, what is the problem? there isn't a disclaimer when you sign up for these sites "you must tell the the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth." shit, it's basically the opposite! social networking breeds on lies, it's based on the fact that we can hide how we really feel or disguise it so well that it comes out like a bad poem instead of a diary entry. I can sympathize because the hidden-ness is definitely attractive sometimes, more so to the writer than the observer. but be careful, friends, lest your ramblings and words fall so deep beneath the threshold of understanding that even you cannot wade into the abyss to retrieve them! or, fuck, just write whatever you want.
HA! |
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| TOUR |
[Jan. 24th, 2008|03:48 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Everywhere! | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | STOKED | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Saul Williams - Break | ] |
FUCK YEAH. This shit is going to be so tight. We leave Saturday. I get to see a bunch of my friends on the tour (some old, some new!), play fucking awesome metal, travel in a sweet van, use my badass point of sale software (which is almost complete!) and, hopefully, ride my bike in a bunch of new cities during the second half of the tour (when it's actually warm).
See you on the road!
XVX |
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| If you can't love yourself, how can you love anyone else? |
[Jan. 16th, 2008|01:22 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | nerdy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Amorphis - Grieve Stricken Heart | ] |
Dim int1 As Integer
Sub update()
int1 = ActiveCell.Value
Range("F4") = Range("F4") + int1
End Sub
That, ladies and gentlemen, is my VERY FIRST EVER visual basic code. It puts the value of the active cell into the cell F4, and then continues to add the value of the active cell to the current value of F4 each time the macro is run. Why would this be relevant? Well, if the active cell contained a quantity of items sold, and F4 was to indicate how many items total were sold, this rudimentary subroutine would act as a sort of "inventory" mechanism. Linked to a button, it would also act as a very, very rough point of sale system. Why is THAT relevant? Because Anagnorisis is going to be running a motherfucking point of sale terminal at the merch booth! You tell us what you want (shirt, CD, patch, etc.), we "ring it up," take your cash OR CREDIT CARD (!!) and then print you out a nice little receipt. We shouldn't even call it a merch booth. This is going to be a goddamn store!
But, in order for all this to work I have to nail this POS (Point of Sale) system on Excel VBA (Visual Basic for Applications) and make it super, super easy so whoever is running the merch table can use it. For awhile I was trying out some other POS system I downloaded, but they are all way too complicated and above and beyond what I need, nor are they user friendly to all (my band mates are not all as Excel-inclined as I). Excel VBA will be able to do what I need it to, I just have to program it. But if I can update cells in real time with a button, I can write a goddamn POS system. We already have a wonderful, tiny Bluetooth receipt printer that I am going to create a custom receipt for (that a button will automatically generate, of course).
So, provided I can nail all this in a week and a half, a visit to the Anagnorisis merch table will be unlike any other merch table you've been to before. All major credit cards, Paypal, and cash accepted, receipts for all purchases, and hot merch dudes! Well, the latter is up to you, I guess. My initial hesitation to learning VBA was the sheer volume of it, especially for what I wanted to do, but it's a fucking programming language, how hard can it be? I've done C, R (this weird data processing thing for a CS class), and Maple modules (little applets that show kids how to differentiate, find the slope of a line, things of that nature). Visual Basic "event driven" according to Wikipedia and so far seems pretty intuitive. Declare your variables, name your procedures, etc. Learning it will give me another excellent tool in my belt, though I'm not sure how far I'll get - probably just enough to program this system.
Enough talk. I need to learn this and get it done. We leave for tour in a week and a half. 15-17 dates, depending on how much we get booked. Check www.myspace.com/anagnorisis for all the dates/venues. Louisville is on the 31st, so that will be fun.
METAL! (and programming!!!) |
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| hotmail/windows live |
[Dec. 9th, 2007|04:12 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | relaxed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | opeth - reverie/harlequin forest | ] |
Samuel Hartman
shartman@hotmail.com
Registered since: December 10, 1996
Eleven years of internet insanity. I remember when I got it, in the library at my school, when everyone was into "chathouse.com" and the internet was this totally new, crazy thing that had no real purpose except to act silly and talk to people that you saw everyday anyway. "What's your e-mail address?" was the new cool thing to ask. Changed my fucking life. Goddamn.
In other news, Anagnorisis played a great show on Friday, sold a ton of merch, and now we are booking a tour for January and writing new material. It's brutal and fast as fuck. Tons of blastbeats. Our CD is out - you can order it off our myspace or just ask me for a copy.
Working at a health food store now, mostly doing computer stuff. Winter moves in, life moves on. So far it's just been very rainy, which is annoying for biking, but the lack of sub 20 F temperatures is desirable.
Diem perdidi. Donatio mortis causa. |
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| ripped from jamie / not enough sleep |
[Nov. 16th, 2007|04:54 am] |
You.
Can.
Only.
Type.
One.
Word.
1. Where is your cell phone?
front.
2. Your significant other?
carbs.
3. Your hair?
up.
4. Your mother?
amazing.
5. Your father?
dead.
6. Your favorite thing?
knowledge.
7. Your dream last night?
inconsequential.
8. Your favorite drink?
water.
9. Your dream/goal?
wisdom.
10. The room you're in?
mine.
11. Your ex?
rad.
12. Your fear?
failure.
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years?
succeeding.
14. Where were you last night?
denham's.
15. What you're not?
weak.
16. Muffins?
strawberry.
17. One of your wish list items?
kettlebell.
18. Where you grew up?
indiana.
19. The last thing you did?
typed.
20. What are you wearing?
H&M.
21. Your TV?
flatscreen.
22. Your pet(s)?
unnecessary.
23. Your computer?
clogged.
24. Your life?
cadence.
25. Your mood!
analytical.
26. Missing someone?
mutual?
27. Your car?
emissions.
28. Something your not wearing?
tigers.
29. Favorite Store?
grace.
30. Your summer?
metal.
31. Like someone?
fucked.
32. Your favorite color?
black.
33. When is the last time you laughed?
dawkins.
34. Last time you cried?
ages.
35. Who will/would repost this?
you! |
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| new record |
[Oct. 31st, 2007|07:20 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home! | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Oakenfold - Chase (Swordfish soundtrack) | ] |
man I'm tired as fuck but I guess I should update as I planned to (about 1/2 an hour ago anyway. I could change my plans and go to bed now. but why? I should let people know what's going on. so here you go).
I moved into my new place monday about 11am, finishing the actual unloading of stuff and furniture around 5pm. I am now basically completely unpacked and it's 7:30am wednesday. fuck. yes. that's definitely a new record for me. I have so much goddamn room in this place it's unreal. and it's cheap. good location. clean. friendly landlord. quiet. etc. etc. etc. I am so fucking lucky to have found it. what does it look like, you ask?
( check it! )
so yeah. I'm moved in. work is typical. I want to buy a kettlebell soon as every monday invigorates me to do it really seriously. that shit is such a fucking work-out and so much fun. and our instructor is fucking rad and really knows how to push us. I ride sporadically - sometimes 20 or 30 miles a day, other days just 15 or nothing at all. I'm worried that doing heavy lifting on some days and extreme cardio on the others are canceling each other out? but that's probably bogus since it's all exercise and improves my body overall. obviously increased muscle mass means a heavier ride, but as my friend eric pointed out when we rode together, the more weight you have the faster you will get moving down a hill (this after he drafted me at about 30 mph or so coming out of seneca park. shit was intense!)
I finally decided to put a picture of my late biological father up. it's him in class or at a lecture with his face in his hands, looking bored or exasperated. I can relate to both and am secretly hoping after the picture was taken he flipped out about some detail that was wrong, raised his arms, and yelled "ahhhhhhhh!" :) |
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| pull n' pray |
[Aug. 18th, 2007|06:47 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | herbivorous | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dragonforce - operation ground and pound | ] |
it's fucking 7 in the morning and I'm still up! insanity. my new job is to blame for this. I now work at CityScoot, a fully-insured designated driver service in Louisville. We send drivers out to bars to drive home those who shouldn't be driving, in their car, and then scoot away in a fold-up scooter that we place in their trunk. It's genius! Except on Friday's when we get fucking slammed with like 10 calls at once...fuck. Last night/this morning was insane, definitely the craziest night so far in the three weeks I've been working there. A straight-edge kid helping drunk people get home; weird, no? But the job has its pluses: no early morning wake-ups, good pay, very flexible schedule (my boss is totally cool with my touring and shit), awesome co-workers (including one of my good friends Kent), and we're doing a great service for Louisville.
[side-note: notice how as I progress my grammar goes from lower-case at the beginning of sentences to uppercase. must be my academic 'angel' overriding the 'stylistic' demon or some shit. except this note is an exception to the rule. what? I should go to bed]
but I'm NOT going to bed because at 8am there's a big farmer's market down the street and I intend to roll out there on my bike and score some local produce. I have already been to two this week and gotten the hook up on peppers, "burpless" cucumbers and some other cool things. and fuck does it feel good to support local farmers instead of buying shit that traveled thousands of miles to get to Louisville eating up fossil fuel. okay, fuck the capitalization shit, it's gone.
the other thing I wanted to write about was how this is the first august in what I believe is 17 years (goddamn) that I haven't started a semester at school, be it elementary or high school, college, or grad school. someone mentioned the other night how "school is starting" for Louisville, and I paid it little mind. yeah, it's going on, but I'm done with that shit. then it hit me, I'm done with that shit, like forever. Well, at least for awhile. I have no idea if I will return. Even though my degree was done 9 months ago and school ended in May, it's really sunk in now. This fall I'm not returning to school. No college lifestyle for me. No new classes, new pupils to make friends with (not like that really happened much with high-level math classes anyway). Very eerie. I kind of miss it, honestly. The social atmosphere at a university is unmatched. It's very attractive to those who can stand to be social for a period of time (which I can, even though I generally enjoy solitude nowadays).
so that's that. anagnorisis becomes active again in september as august was our nice month off. we recorded an album in hot, sticky florida and I rode my bike a lot when I wasn't recording. I have been averaging about 10 miles a day, 20 if I'm lucky, and what I would guess to be about 100 a week now. At that rate I'm putting more miles on my bike a year than my car. Drive less! Fossil fuels illustrate our greed for convenience and America's dependence on a non-renewable resource that is going to totally fuck us in the future. Random political rant. Haha.
So except for a few minor annoyances, which everyone has to deal with, things are moving forward and changing, just as life should. Fuck being stagnant, but don't lose hold of your inner convictions. If you really want some change, vote Kucinich.
That's it. XVX motherfuckers! |
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| Death Machine |
[Jul. 4th, 2007|12:35 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Scarlet - Swarm Manifesto | ] |
Tour was pretty crazy. Some very good times, some very bad times.
+
Memphis, TN
Richmond, VA
New Bern, NC
-
Jackson, MS
Murfreesboro, TN
Today we leave for St. Petersburg, FL to record our album at Mana Recording Studios. Our hotel is right on the beach; I can't wait. Hopefully we will be touring quite a bit on our return. Enjoy your summer.
XVX |
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| Tour! |
[Jun. 15th, 2007|02:28 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | STOKED | ] |
| [ | music |
| | swallow the sun - gloom, beauty, and despair | ] |
Fuck yeah! I get to hang out with my band mates and Amanda for 9 days!! Haha. I hope we don't drive each other all nuts. Shit is gonna be OFF THE CHAIN.
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| quick update |
[Jun. 4th, 2007|12:21 am] |
| [ | music |
| | satyricon - nemesis divina | ] |
my lap top screen is fucked so I am sending it in to get fixed. hopefully this means I will actually READ BOOKS and do other productive things this week.
louisville is rad as always, as are the people.
I am going to florida for three weeks or so, probably in july, to re-record the anagnorisis album with the band. we get to record at mana studios (a very metal place to record) and zach and I are going to swim in the atlantic as much as humanly possible. we have already gotten warmed up by using his friends' pool three times in the past week. fuck yes for swimming. I had forgotten what a true summer time activity (and how to enjoy myself as such!) swimming is.
I am about to sign a record contract and "sign away" the next year of my life. I am excited. I am going to be a rock musician and tour the world. or, something like that.
strawberry muffins made with date sugar (instead of cane sugar) are awesome. the end. |
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| "I must be....destroyed!" |
[May. 27th, 2007|09:33 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | the end - awake? | ] |
fuck. anagnorisis is destroyed. adam and I are both super sick. zak d. got sick last week, and we all got home at like 6am sunday morning from this fucking goregrind show (which we played, oddly enough) in charleston, IL. my throat is fucked, I have an eye infection, and I have lots of shit I need to do. curses.
other than that I suppose things are good, I finally got my room set up the way I want it if I could just keep it clean without throwing my clothes all over the place every night. it's weird; when I was younger I could never fathom how someone would let their clothes get on the floor, but now that I'm so busy/tired my garments some times end up there for over a day. this is an action that must be revoked (I'm reminded of the "irrevocable" ethic of the vegan straight-edge atheist).
I've scored some pretty rad CDs from my work both with discounts and just from looking in the free promo boxes. the new "the end" is interesting, definitely a change from their tech metal 'within dividia.' I found the "remixed" Nothing (Meshuggah) a couple days ago in the used bin, which means I got it for four dollars, and while it's no huge improvement from the original version, it does come with some live footage and considerably better artwork than the '02 release.
eye infections mean wearing contacts is super uncomfortable, so I'm trying to figure out what I can do to be both productive and not have to see more than three feet. haha. I guess I'll take a shower after being in a fucking smoky club all night, listening to "gurgle grind" - you have not heard insane vocals, or music for that matter, until you've seen one-man (find me a girl doing this, please! I would love to see it) goregrind bands with a drum machine. I cannot even begin to describe how it transcends much of what I already knew about the goregrind scene and took musical insanity into a new level. austin even got up on stage and did some fucking cookie monster vocals (or gurgling or whatever you want to call it) with one band. hahahaha, it was hilarious. if you have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, just listen to a couple tracks of this and imagine anagnorisis playing with this band (which we did!).
all right, shower time. get sick, motherfuckers. brrrrrrgahgfhewhwhgsagfsgf. haha. |
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| "what is the most important thing we can give away? the future!" |
[May. 7th, 2007|04:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | pumped | ] |
| [ | music |
| | behemoth - slaves shall serve (live) | ] |
-slayer is touring marilyn manson and bleeding through??!!!!!
-got a job at ear-motherfucking-x-tacy
-anagnorisis is doing great. midwest tour next week, big show this saturday, another good show on the 22nd in the 'ville. INDY AND LOUISVILLE YOU BETTER COME FUCKING SEE US - dates
-live within biking distance from pretty much everything now. louisville rules.
-vegan room mates!
-getting a fucking metal pedal board made
-new local gym that's family owned, fucking rad, lots of weight training
HELL YEAH MOTHERFUCKERS
XVX |
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| Destroy. Erase. Improve. |
[Apr. 11th, 2007|01:40 pm] |
I am writing this update on my new HP dv9000t! Goddamn this thing is hot. Intel Core 2 Duo 2.0 GHz, 512 MB nVidia GeForce card, HD-DVD-RW drive, beautiful 17" wide-screen and a whole bunch of other shit which I haven't even discovered yet. It's really comfortable to type on, except I keep hitting the touchpad with my hand. I'll get used to it. I finally got like half the pre-installed programs off; now I'm working on updating Windows and getting my shit installed (Opera, AIM, etc.). Anyone want to sell me a wireless LAN router? |
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| computer genius / craigslist rules |
[Apr. 3rd, 2007|12:16 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | enjoyable | ] |
| [ | music |
| | pig destroyer - piss angel | ] |
goddamn craigslist rules. I put my apartment up there this evening, say, 6pm? and I've already gotten TWO calls and TWO e-mails about it from people who are super serious about taking it. haha! fucking awesome. and last weekend I put my old filing cabinet up there and got like four calls within two days. so I got rid of that shit too. shit is movin' fast, just like me! I move may 1st, found my place in crescent hill, totally psyched on it. tons of room, basement apartment (the bedroom has no windows!!!!!), good biking distance (about 3 miles, but hey, it will be fun once I get a road bike), cool landlord, etc. etc.
this morning my fucking computer was off; tried to turn it back on and it shuts off, eventually won't even turn on. I figure it's the power supply. so I pulled out this case my friend josh gave me like two years ago because I remembered it had a power supply in it already and a couple fans. glad I kept it! I fucking transplanted my motherboard and all the components over, though I left the broken dvd drive, ZIP drive (remember those?) and floppy drive in the old computer because I never used that shit anyway. now it works fucking perfect; three fans blowing on everything to keep it cool, and a pretty black case with a clear plastic side view into the side. I need to put a light in there, it would be pretty. there's so much room inside, too, my shit hardly fills it up. I'm just proud I was able to basically build a computer from the ground up (city from the ground up!) without fucking anything up and I nailed it. NAILED IT.
otherwise shit is cool, made pasta tonight and helped bekah with her computer. damn macs. haha. busy week(s) ahead, but enjoyable. sunday is band practice FINALLY. I cannot wait to rock that shit. come see us on tour! dates on the myspace page: www.myspace.com/anagnorisis. if I can I will put you on the guest list, but for cities where I know lots of people (indy, louisville) it will probably fill up quick.
vegan straight-edge! |
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| sick |
[Mar. 28th, 2007|06:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | so fucking sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | exhumed - casket crusher | ] |
holy shit, I got the worst flu/viral infection ever last night. I woke up about 15 times during the night and every time I would try to go back to bed, my mathematical mind would start making different sequences of the positions I was laying in (one knee bent, on my back, etc.). fuck it was rough. I feel better today but I'm still sore as fuck, and I don't want to eat anything. we dumpstered about 20 boxes of strawberries last night so my fridge is bursting with that shit. jill is coming over tonight to watch lost and I am going to make her force me to eat something. I just want to curl up and die. haha. plus I have a ton of stuff for school, club, moving to louisville, etc. I did secure my apartment though. it's in crescent hill by osaka. awesome! I miss my parents and my friends; they are the one thing that will sustain me. my piano lesson was horrible today and I feel like I'm getting worse. I'm blasting exhumed to make me feel better. fuck being sick! |
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